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[23 Feb 2009|10:40pm] |
I don't really want a job. I just want to do magic.
I think... that the academic environment is becoming less and less interesting to me. But when I read about feats of mind-body Crazyshit, or spirit possession, or martial arts, or chi manipulation, I am totally drawn in. Same thing with strategy. I goddamn love strategy, can't get enough of strategy games.
I hope I'm this interested in hunting and gathering... if I don't have a career, I'll need to be happy surviving on my skills, the land, and nothing else.
Why am I wasting time with this education crap? I wanna make plant golems.
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[19 Jan 2009|01:20am] |
I think I have to transfer. I've been avoiding the idea, but that's not going to be an option much longer. I love the environment here, but the simple reality is this: there are two part-time psychology professors. I think I've taken all but two of the psych courses this college has to offer. There are two lit professors: I believe that one of them has a wholly self-indulgent way of thinking, with little interest in attaining truth from novels and plenty of interest in appearances. The other teaches classes with subject matter that only occasionally interests me. There is one anthropology prof, who seems not particularly devoted to his work and whose main area of expertise seems to be his airy, droning voice and its enormous capacity to put one to sleep.
And the plain strange reality is this: I came to COA thinking of myself as a generalist. But in a fairly short amount of time, I have repeatedly specialized. Science is no longer of interest to me. Formal and vocational philosophy I find superficial. Mathematics often bore me. Visual art I have phasing interest in. Academically, my interests have become solidly centered on literature and psychology. Unless someone starts offering classes in wilderness awareness, martial arts, Qi Gong, or theoretical shamanic healing practices, I have a fairly clear academic niche.
But where the hell else would I go? COA is by far the best place that's likely to let me in (off the top of my head anyway, no offense meant to the rest of you who've found great alternative colleges with high rates of admission). Otherwise there's Evergreen or some other state school where I'd take mundanely labeled classes. After going to COA, I don't know if that's even an option. Not to mention my vanity regarding the status of my school.
And it's more than vanity. I guess I have a certain degree of COA pride. I get along with the people here. I'm starting to become attached to them. I've observed that the people I hang out with are mostly science-focused; I don't fit in with the Human Studies focused people, but maybe that's because they tend not to be very smart. The smarter people here are typically those who take Biochem.
So it seems like my options, so far, are as follows: 1) stay at COA and try to eke out satisfactory classes through tutorials and independent studies, b) transfer to Evergreen, which also seems to have a somewhat lacking psych department, or iii) find some other school.
I'm leaning toward 1, but that seems more likely to produce satisfaction than ecstatic enthusiasm for learning. El sigh. Here's hoping for teachers willing to do lots of 1-on-1s.
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[07 Jan 2009|03:17pm] |
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You guys: cranberries + balsamic vinegar + nutmeg + cayenne + cumin + cinnamon = level 25 delicious.
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[29 Dec 2008|12:22am] |
1) What is so shady about me? I swear, every other person on the street gives me a suspicious glare.
2) Which is worse: to be bored or to dislike oneself?
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[27 Dec 2008|07:39pm] |
It really annoys me when people talk about MAN being the ultimate prey or whatnot. At its best, that is a silly conjecture, and at its worst it is self-absorbed and obnoxious. I think the idea stems from this story I once read that was written in the 1930s or something. But honestly. Modern humans? From the US and Europe? That is not... that is not remotely a challenge compared to stalking your average deer. What the hell.
Hey, man, you know what would be the most difficult thing to hunt ever? Someone who was raised surrounded by loud noises created by big machines, with dulled senses of smell, who has their food delivered to them, and has never been in a life-threatening situation! Yeah, that'll be SO hard. Way harder than hunting a creature who's been hunted their whole life due to how delicious they are, with natural defenses and a forest full of birds and squirrels who will alert them at the first sign of danger! Yeah!
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[20 Dec 2008|10:45am] |
Dude! I got a Daily Deviation on DeviantArt!
I know it's not really that big of a thing, but it makes me really happy. Like, maybe my writing has genuine potential? Maybe? Oh gosh hope hope hope.
Dance Dance Dance.
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[16 Dec 2008|12:34am] |
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Friday January 16th Friday January 16th Battlestar Galactica that is all.
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| Just call me Blind Coyote |
[10 Dec 2008|01:55pm] |
Well, 96 hours with no food and no vision.
There are plenty of possible reasons for me to have failed. I came back after day 2 to avoid frostbite; does fasting not count if you're lying in bed? I drank tea instead of water part of the time to get me in a more spiritual mindset. Maybe that actually hindered me. Maybe my high tolerance for mind-affecting substances translates to a high tolerance for mind-affecting experiences. What does that mean? I'll have to take a five or six day fast? I don't know if I can tolerate that much pain.
Urgh. Maybe it's time for the Southwestern approach to Vision Quests. Or maybe I'm just not ready to be an adult.
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| Copied from Eloise because I like bears |
[05 Dec 2008|05:10pm] |
The first ten people to comment in this post AND repost this meme in their own journal get to request a sketch on the topic of their choosing from me!
If you are not a sketcher, I'm sure you have an art form you can use to "sketch" for others. This totally counts. (:
Given my limited artistic abilities, these will be doodles. Probably on lined paper, to preserve the doodlish authenticity.
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[05 Dec 2008|01:37am] |
It's comforting to know how many other guys have that experience.
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[16 Nov 2008|04:41pm] |
1) I look pretty good and super gay in a scarf
2) I like having my assessments of people confirmed. Makes me feel smart.
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[14 Nov 2008|11:16pm] |
I Am A: Chaotic Good Human Ranger (3rd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength-11
Dexterity-15
Constitution-13
Intelligence-12
Wisdom-15
Charisma-12
Alignment:
Chaotic Good A chaotic good character acts as his conscience directs him with little regard for what others expect of him. He makes his own way, but he's kind and benevolent. He believes in goodness and right but has little use for laws and regulations. He hates it when people try to intimidate others and tell them what to do. He follows his own moral compass, which, although good, may not agree with that of society. Chaotic good is the best alignment you can be because it combines a good heart with a free spirit. However, chaotic good can be a dangerous alignment because it disrupts the order of society and punishes those who do well for themselves.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Class:
Rangers are skilled stalkers and hunters who make their home in the woods. Their martial skill is nearly the equal of the fighter, but they lack the latter's dedication to the craft of fighting. Instead, the ranger focuses his skills and training on a specific enemy a type of creature he bears a vengeful grudge against and hunts above all others. Rangers often accept the role of protector, aiding those who live in or travel through the woods. His skills allow him to move quietly and stick to the shadows, especially in natural settings, and he also has special knowledge of certain types of creatures. Finally, an experienced ranger has such a tie to nature that he can actually draw on natural power to cast divine spells, much as a druid does, and like a druid he is often accompanied by animal companions. A ranger's Wisdom score should be high, as this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)
Hmm... vexing.
I had 8 points in ranger, 0 points in barbarian, bard, sorceror, and wizard, -4 points in cleric and fighter, -6 points in rogue, -15 in druid, -19 in monk, and -23 in paladin.
I am confused as to why I am not at least secondarily druid... sadface? Maybe because druids aren't allowed to be chaotic good... I was somewhat close to neutral good. Maybe they'd let me be a druid if I was neutral good. Hmmmm... changing my answers to yield a neutral good alignment turns druid into the secondary choice. I am slightly comforted. And what is with everyone being a human? I was one point away from being an elf, evidently.
I think maybe my constitution is lower and my intelligence is higher maybe.
EDIT: Ha! Changing one answer turns me into a druid.
Also if my rambling about fantastical archetypes and where I fit in annoys you, I should not listen to words coming from your mouth and vice versa.
PS: Lawrence, if you still check livejournal I'm curious to see what your results on this quiz are, 'cause I think you're a Wizard/Fighter with one of those prestige classes that reduces arcane spell failure. And also that Augment Familiar feat and maxed out Knowledge(nature) and Handle Animal.
Also May I'm curious what it thinks you are.
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[14 Nov 2008|10:08am] |
Um... click on them so my dragons will be ultimate? I promise it's not a trap.
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| This just in! |
[05 Nov 2008|10:00am] |
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McCain challenges Obama to double-or-nothing surfing competition for the presidency!
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maskbreaker's journal